A nun walked into the corner liquor store and asked the proprietor for a
fifth of whiskey.
"Sister, now how would it look for a respectable fellow like me to sell
alcohol to a nun?"
The woman leaned over the counter and whispered conspiratorially, "It's really
for the Mother Superior's constipation."
The store owner thought it over and decided to sell it to her since it
was for medicinal purposes, but only on condition that she hide it in a
paper bag and not tell anyone.
An hour later the store owner closed up and walked outside, only to
immediately come across the nun on a park bench, roaring drunk.
"Sister," he said angrily, "you know I only sold you that whiskey
because it was to ease Mother Superior's constipation."
"It ish," slurred the nun.  "When she sees me, she'll shit."