FileTitle: Prose1334.html
Category: Humor
Type: Prose
Description: Chicken Launcher
I do not know the author, but I have been told this is a true story.
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 In a recent issue of "Meat & Poultry" magazine, editors quoted from
"Feathers," the publication of the California Poultry Industry
Federation, telling the following story:

 It seems the US Federal Aviation Administration has a unique device for
testing the strength of windshields on airplanes.  The device is a gun
that launches a dead chicken at a plane's windshield at approximately the
speed the plane flies.

 The theory is that if the windshield doesn't crack from the carcass
impact, it'll survive a real collision with a bird during flight.  It
seems the British were very interested in this and wanted to test a
windshield on a brand new, speedy locomotive they're developing.

 They borrowed the FAA's chicken launcher, loaded the chicken and fired.
The ballistic chicken shattered the windshield, went through the
engineer's chair, broke an instrument panel and embedded itself in the
back wall of the engine cab.  The British were stunned and asked the FAA
to recheck the test to see if everything was done correctly.

 The FAA reviewed the test thoroughly and had one recommendation:

 "Use a thawed chicken."