Did you hear about the hooker who specialized in bondage?  She was always
strapped for cash.

Spouse:  Something you screw on the bed to get the chores done.

Birth control pill:  The other thing a woman can put in her mouth to keep from
getting pregnant.

"You really shouldn't smoke," the new client said to the hooker.  "It stunts
your growth."  The woman blew a smoke ring, looked down at his privates and
said,
"Yeah, and what's your excuse?"