A dwarf with a lisp goes to an agricultural show to buy a mare. He
  wanders around until he comes across a beautiful mare inside a
  small enclosure with a farmer standing at the gate.  He goes up to
  the farmer and says, "Excthuth me, can I have a look at your
  horth?"  "Sure", says the farmer, "come on in." The dwarf wanders
  round and round the mare and then stops, says to the farmer "Her
  eyeth, her eyeth, I want to see her eyeth."  The farmer has to bend
  down and pick up the dwarf to show him the mare's eyes.  "Nith
  eyeth, nith eyeth, I like thith horth, I like thith horth, I think
  I want to buy thith horth."  Once again the dwarf wanders around
  the horse, in turn asking the farmer to  pick him up and show him
  the mare's ears and exclaiming, "Nith earth, nith  earth, I like
  thith horth, I like thith horth, I think I want to buy thith
  horth."  The farmer is starting to get pissed off by this  stage
  because the dwarf is  quite heavy.  Suddenly the dwarf stops in his
  tracks and says, "Her twat. her twat, I want  to thee her twat!"
  The farmer, infuriated, pick up the dwarf and drives him head first
  into the  mare's backside.  He leaves the dwarf's little legs
  kicking and wanders off to talk to his  friends for a couple of
  minutes.  He then comes back and extracts the dwarf  from his
  predicament, "SCHLOOOOP!"  The dwarf wipes himself down and says.
  "I think I better wephrath that .... I'd like to thee her gallop!"