A very religious man has been saving for years and years planning to go
 to the Vatican to hear the Pope give mass.  He is there in the middle of a
huge crowd when the Pope walks down the street.  He watches the  Pope 
come up to a derelict and whisper in his ear and then walk to church.  The 
man is amazed that someone of such grace and splendor would talk to such 
a dirty, poor man. The second day the same thing happens.  The Pope walks 
down the street and stops at the same derelict, whispers in his ear and 
walks to church.  The man is amazed again.  He wants to hear this for 
himself so he pays the derelict 10 bucks to take his place. The next day 
the Pope came walking down the  street and approached the man.  The man 
became the happiest he's ever been anticipating having a conversation 
with the Pope.  The Pope leans over to him and says, "I thought I told 
you to get the fuck outta here!"