One evening, this guy was walking through the upstairs of his house when he hear
s his young son saying his Bedtime Prayers: "God bless Mommy, God Bless Daddy, G
ob Bless Grandma, God Bless Grandpa, Goodbye Uncle Ed."
"Goodbye Uncle Ed?", thought the guy, "What could the kid have meant by
that?"  Well the next day, they got a phone call; seems old Uncle Ed up and took
 a heart attack.  Killed him deader than hell. "Hmm... " thought the guy. "How a
bout that."
A few months later, the guy hears his son praying again: "God bless Mommy, God b
less Daddy, God bless Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa."  Sure enough, the next day Gran
dpa was crossing the street when he got hit by a bus.  Never knew what hit him.
 "Well," said our hero, "This kid is two for two."
A few weeks later he hears the kid a third time: "God bless Mommy, God bless Gra
ndma, Goodbye Daddy."  They guy is alarmed! "Oh my God! This is it! I'm finished
! It is the end of the line! The fat lady has sung! It's all over!"
So he went to bed that night, but didn't sleep too well.  The next morning
he looks out the window and sees the sun coming up on a beautiful day and says "
Ah, what the Hell, might as well go out in a blaze of glory."
He hops in his car, tears down the street a 90 miles per hour, running over
a motorcycle cop along the way.  He goes into his office, empties all his
desk drawers on the floor, throws papers everywhere, goes in and cusses out his
boss and pinches the secretary on the ass as he walks out the door.
Then he goes down to the local bar, orders a round for the house, and
procedes to get schnockered.
Well, three o'clock in the afternoon rolls around, and he is still there.
At four o'clock he orders another drink and waits.  At five o'clock he
starts to panic.  "What am I going to do?  I'm in trouble with the cops, I
don't have a job, and I've got this $1000 bar tab.  Let's hurry up and get
this over with!"
Finally at six o'clock, he gets in his car and slowly drives home.  He goes
into his house and plops himself down on the couch.  His wife walks in, and
he says "Honey, I had a really bad day."  His wife says "You think you had
a bad day?  I went outside this morning and found the mailman dead on the front
porch!"