Alan F. G. Lewis has been called the world's greatest punster. Here are a
few of my favorites:

"I told her no sensible man would take her dancing in her bikini, so she
went with a  little moron."

"Back-seat driving is a form of duel control."

"Goblin your food is bad for your elf."

"Bambi could never have been a mother if her hart hadn't been in the right
place."

"When a liar gets pharyngitis, he loses his vice."

"A white lie is aversion of the truth."